Beware the Peloton

I watched an unnecessary amount of the six-hour men’s cycling road race yesterday morning. But that’s the beauty of the Olympics, you turn something on thinking you’ll watch a few minutes, and then suddenly you are two hours in and they still have 87 KM to go and you’re in it to win it. Just like Remco Evenepoel.

The race coverage was split between 3 things:

• The leader out there doing his thang and maybe a few guys trying to chase him down
• Beautiful French countryside ariel shots of historic villas, rolling hills and French patriots cheering on the racers
• THE PELOTON TRYING TO CONSUME ALL

The way the announcers were talking about the Peloton it sounded like an alien blob rolling over the countryside trying to catch the leaders so it could continue to grow and take over the world. Here are some of the more terrifying updates I saw online:

And there were so many spectators! Were they taken by the peloton? Or is it a T-Rex situation and the Peloton only sees people when they are a on bike and moving so people cheering with their feet on the ground are safe?

But we know one person who successfully escaped the Peloton, Remco Evenepoel of Belgium. He almost didn’t escape when his tire went flat with less than 5k to go in front of the Louvre. My favorite part was the announcers saying “he’s probably going to be the only person from the Olympics who doesn’t have fond memories of the Louvre.” Can you imagine announcing a six hour race? I can’t imagine what weird things would come out of my mouth after hour 4.

But back to Remco, he celebrated escaping the Peloton with a badass picture on the finish line with the Eiffel Tower in the background. I wonder what part of the 6 hours he thought of that idea, did he workshop it for an entire hour in the middle or did it come to him at the very end.

I’m sure either way he was thinking “not today Peloton, not today.”

(but the women’s road race is soon so the female peloton is about to start its rampage, watch out everyone!)